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Predictions: How DS9 Ends

By Emerson Schwartzkopf

Our latest guess is that Kira gets it in the end (well, she dies, anyway) and the Bajorans go radical right-wing and blow up the wormhole as the station disintegrates, and Sisko either loses Kasidy just like his first wife, or he manages to save her to complete the emotional loop.

Worf will go back to the Enterprise. Bashir will take some lonely post somewhere to pursue more research. Whatever the hell Dax we now have will croak. Jake will do some serious writing. O’Brien and Keiko will go back to Starfleet Academy to teach, where he will join Rom on the faculty.

Quark, meanwhile, will find himself with all sorts of crap from the Delta Quadrant that is now beyond all mention of quantifiable worth. He will immediately become Grand Nagus.

After all this, we will transition back to the 1950s with Avery Brooks’ character of a writer thinking all this up, at which point we will see him shot at a Mississippi church during a voter-registration drive by a hayseed played by Marc Alaimo. (I don’t know whether I’m kidding or not.)

Or maybe we’ll hear a voice saying, "I had a stranger dream than yours, Bob," and it’ll be Suzanne Pleshette . . . .

Follow-Up

The interest here in SF is waning, as far as TV is concerned. We don’t get the Sci-Fi Channel (although its value is dubious), and we found the end of Voyager somewhat more of a roll down a 9 percent grade than a real cliffhanger.

We also thought the end of Deep Space Nine really stunk up the joint. Sure, just leave Kasidy as a single parent; hey, you’re a full-blown demi-god now!

Whacking Gul Dukat also proved pretty crummy, since he wasn’t just all evil. Making Odo and Kira go through heartbreak city smelled as well; with two great guys taking a powder, she’s heading for the religious orders eventually.

That leaves Bashir from the original cast; makes him a pretty good candidate for the Starfleet 12-step program in a year of two.

Oh yeah, Jake! We just seem to keep forgetting about the guy, just like the writers for two-thirds of the damn show.

We only agreed on two bits of good: the big fight between Gowron and Worf (now that tied up the loose ends nicely, although Worf should’ve taken the throne) and Rom becoming Grand Nagus.

The best of G-Force Holy Order of QAPLA Who We Are Major Hollywood Celebs Movies Trivia When the TV is Off HOQ Store Voyager Synopses B5 Synopses Miscellany
The best of G-Force
HOQ Home
Who We Are and Why We're Here
Major Hollywood Celebs
Movies
Trivia
When the TV is Off
HOQ Store
Voyager Synopses
B5 Synopses
Miscellany